Log Date: Tuesday. Weather: Too bright. Mood: Irritable.
I dusted off the old flashcart for this one, expecting a nice stroll through a new region. The intel said "Pokemon Invocation". Sounds fancy. Too fancy. I should have known better when I saw the mission brief mentioning "shards" and "ancient artifacts". Whatever happened to just beating a mafia boss in a suit? Now it's all gods and crystals.
THE REGION: CLUTTERED WITH NONSENSE
I woke up in this region—Invocation, they call it—after some dream sequence. Standard procedure. My roommate tells me Professor Kabal needs help. Fine. I put on my Running Shoes (thank heavens they work indoors, or I would have turned around right there) and set off.
But something feels off. The air is thick with... data. This doesn't feel like the Kanto countryside. The local technology is overwhelming. They have this thing called "Terastalization". I threw out my Rattata and suddenly it's wearing a chandelier on its head? What is a 'Mega' evolution? Sounds broken. And now we have crystal hats? Back in my day, if you wanted your Pokemon to be stronger, you gave it a Protein and told it to walk it off. Too many modern features ruined the vibe.
THE WILDLIFE: UNIDENTIFIABLE OBJECTS
I walked into the tall grass expecting a Pidgey. Maybe a Sentret if I was feeling exotic. Instead, I ran into something that looked like a Digimon rejected from 2002. They call them "Fakemon". I call them abominations. I want 151 Pokemon, maybe 251. I don't need a Pokedex that requires a firmware update to understand.
NOTE: If you see a creature that looks like it was drawn by a committee, run. It probably has a signature move that reads like a legal document.
THE ANOMALIES: MECHANICS AND TECH
I will give the region credit for one thing: the "EXP All" device. My joints aren't what they used to be, and grinding on Metapods takes a toll on the thumbs. It feels just like 1999 (but faster). It’s a toggle, too, so the young masochists can turn it off if they want.
However, the region is unstable. It's currently classified as "Demo 2.0". That means the roads just end. I marched for seven hours, fighting through these crystal-hat-wearing monstrosities, only to hit a wall. Seven hours is a good hike, but I prefer a finished map.
MISSION DEBRIEF
This "Invocation" is trying too hard. It's got side stories about "Almia" (isn't that from those Ranger spin-offs? Bah!) and mysterious groups hunting shards. It's busy. It's loud. It's got scanlines if I squint, but the soul feels synthetic. If you like your Pokemon wearing jewelry and evolving into things that don't exist in the textbooks, go ahead. Me? I'm going back to Pallet Town.
